Trusting God; My Journey

God and I had this really interesting relationship from my childhood and now into my adulthood. He in a sense was like a parent that knew I loved them but also knew I would go astray into the world to ultimately return back into their arms. Growing up the word of God was always instilled into me by both parents but as far as I could remember mainly my Dad. I remember going to Sunday school and my mom making sure my outfits were POPPING, hair laid in my plats with the cute barrettes, and the orange juice and snacks the church would have for us in the classroom. Y’all I loved Sunday school for that! Another routine that helped lay the foundation of God in my life was my dad making my brother and I read our favorite scripture (mine was “The Narrow and the Wide Gates”) every day before we went to school in the mornings. I’m sure you guys could imagine that this was not an easy task for my father to consistently execute every morning. I was not having it. I would fuss, fight, scream, and cry to not have to read that scripture not knowing that one day I was going to appreciate that. Going into the end of high school this act stopped because my parents separated my 10th grade year and things became different. I lived with my mom and that was not something she enforced so the habit left.  I feel like this was also a time in all of our lives where God’s presence was absent from our minds. Our family was dismantled, finances had to be rearranged and at one point food was harder to come by. As far as me going through life experiences in high school, I was never home. I was staying out at friend’s houses, partying; I just was not grounded, I was everywhere. My mom allowed me to learn on my own how this world works. She without a doubt trusted me that I would not stray away too far and inevitably I came back. By my senior year I calmed down, but instead of trusting God, I trusted the “universe” or other entities. I believed in God but because of the crowd I was around God Talk sounded way crazier than talking about the Universe being on my side and such. To fast forward it was not until I got my heart broken for the first time in college that I turned to God for guidance, strength, and peace. In due time I acquired all that I was praying for. I joined a church, read the bible more, and made godly friends. I started seeing God opening up all of these doors for me the moment I trusted in him and stopped stressing over things I had no control over. Recently I was struggling with bouts of depression occasional anxiety which was horrible but in my eyes this only occurred because I forgot about the trust I had in God and knowing that he was going to turn my life around. I now have it placed in my mind God has the power to change things, and that all I need to do is step back, trust him, and let him do his job. I don’t have time to worry about what can’t be, why did this happen to me, or what’s my next step. Why you might ask? The moment you start trusting God and the plan he has for your life things change for the better. Don't believe me? Just watch what happens.